Some Alternatives to support the unwed mothers and children Part 1/3

After my last column “How abortion can be avoided with common Sense” (1) I took a stand as of why I am against abortion and why I believe that abortion is not necessary.

In this column I want to give you some solutions as of what to do with all of the born babies, how we can support and provide encouragement for the unwed mothers so that they want to keep their babies instead of running to an abortion clinic.

And this is only the tip of the iceberg of possibilities and only a basic approach for many possibilities and opportunities. What it takes is men and women that will stand up and who are willing to fight for the right direction.

It is not enough to be against it – what we need is an Alternative to Abortion.

And this is one of the biggest issues we have today in the conservative movement, all the politicians, bloggers, columnists, and nationwide religious leaders speak out against abortion, but in their effort to fight this cause and their attempt to cut down on public funding for abortion they all fail to provide proper solutions.  How can WE THE PEOPLE – WE THE SOCIETY step in and support young couples and single mothers to keep their babies.

As long as we do not provide these solutions, radical pro-Choice activists, lobbyists, and special interest lawyers will always have a head start over us.

Why is it so hard for conservatives to provide alternative solutions and support?

It all has to do with politics and political ideology. Fiscalconservatives have the problem that on one hand they vote for less government involvement and more personal responsibility, but on the other hand they know very well that when it comes to supporting young parents/families’/single parents some Governmental involvement is necessary in order to provide acceptable solutions.

The trick is to find a middle ground, a solution aside of political or lobbyist interests and to use common sense in order to accomplish both. The secret word is Assistance rather than control.

Though there ARE private organizations and Religious groups stepping in under certain circumstances, counting exclusively on private support through Charity foundations or private organizations does not work because this is not a headline producing issue such as a Tsunami, or Africa support.

Who are we talking about now?

We are talking about social hardships, such as: 

  • Women, who during pregnancy find out that their husband/boyfriend is a dead beat cheater and find themselves all of a sudden – against their original life plan – a single mom.
  • We are talking about young couples who find themselves pregnant and don’t know how to deal with the situation
  • Teenagers, who now made that mistake of having unprotected intercourse or the protection failed for some reason (that is always possible, there is no such thing as a 100% protection).
  • Divorced women who face the challenge of a dead beat father who does not pay his child support.

There are many reasons for being a single parent, and many reasons for women to think about abortion. Bottom line we are talking about those who did not have being a single parent as a life plan but now are facing the challenge of being left behind, and children do cost money.

According to CNPP/USDA, published in 2010 under the title “Expenditures on Children by families, 2009” (2) that a child in the United States cost you, from birth to age 17, an average of $ 205,960 considering a 2.79 percent annual inflation rate Associated Content (3) reports in July 2010. Middle income families will spend $ 286,050 on child rearing while high income earners an average of $ 475,680.

Estimation, made on (4), on my own son, based on my income and living in the Midwest, entering “public college” as a single parent came out with $ 446,720 from birth to age 22 when he is finishing college. And since my son is going to private college – do the math.


Start Age

End Age

Annual cost

































Cost for first Year excluding College: $ 20,696
Total Cost is: $ 446,720

With all love for our children and looking at those numbers that sure can be scary, especially when you are a single mom, or a fresh out of college young couple just entering the workforce, or when you are a teenager and your parents are struggling with the kids they already have, and now they are needed to help financially support a grandchild in order to allow you to get back to school.

Here is the major question:

How can we as a society step in and support women who keep their children, how can we support women who want to give their children up for adoption without putting a blemish on them?

How can we support young parents and unwed young mothers during and after pregnancy?

First, we have to divide between governmental involvements –

What can the government, respectively the politicians do?


What can be done by the private sector accomplish besides providing proper information.

As a fiscal conservative Republican I totally oppose governmental involvement in private enterprise, economy, and private issues. However, social issues and the support of our Citizens future is very well an issue where the government should get involved in order to provide the proper necessities and secure the future of families and our youth. This is called support, and not control.  Part 2 continues our discussion.


8 responses

  1. This is way cool.

    We conservatives have long been painted as hate-mongers, but as a “Judeo”Christian,” I subscribe to the “Jewish” and “Christian” scriptures (hence the name: ‘JudeoChristian’) which say that WE should take care of the homeless and unwed mothers -and others who are needy:

    Isaiah 58:6-7, accepted by Jews & Christians as ‘Canon’ scripture.

    Matthew 25:31-46 and Acts 6:1-3, of the New Testament.

    The 1st two passages say WE ‘citizens’ should take in the homeless -crack your Bible if you’re a fellow-Christian -the 3rd passage has a small role for the church.

    The Government, ironically, is not mentioned as having to take care of the needy.

    Now, I’m not trying to beat anyone over the head with the Bible -if you aren’t a Christian, I still love you, just as God did in John 3:16 -and even Christians (I admit) will have a hard time obeying these passages -but they are WORD. As in accurate & inerrant written Word of God.

    Word up.

    Yes, I know it’s hard to take in a homeless person into your own home -and in not all cases is it safe or appropriate -but when/&/if it’s safe, it can be a blessing to both the homeless person (an unwed mother and/or her baby’s father) -and you, as they can bless you.

    Perhaps we can *also* offer spiritual encouragement as well in helping meet their physical needs -and thus be blessed of our Creator.

    Gordon Wayne Watts
    LAKELAND, between Orlando & Tampa, Fla.

  2. Enigmaticaluna | Reply

    It’s much to said about this subject that hit’s so close to home, but at this time I can’t said anything until I read the entire content of what you are about to said. Your words are realistic, and for most in issue that has to be deal with and everyone seems to look the other way, as “it’s not our problem” but it’s. I appreciate more than you think this effort that you had put to bring this awareness to the people. I can’t wait until you finish it. Thank you for all you do. God Bless.

  3. Tom, one clarification:
    There is NOT a lack of support for these moms to be and their babies. Not all all.

    There are many Pro Life Pregnancy Centers throughout the country that provide, food, diapers, clothing pre-natal care, post natal care, Life Learning skills, you name it – and most of it — FREE of charge.
    We know this 1st hand because our ministry is actively involved with several and have recently donated an ultrasound machine to a PLPC here in SoCal.
    Could we have more PLPC? Of course! But there is not a huge lack of them and
    that’s an important distinction.
    Visit our website, to learn how much help is out there.(
    And we only listed a few out of hundreds!

    That aside, it’s great that you’re involved and addressing the issue.

    We’ve learned since starting our Pro Life Ministry that what we very much lack is: providing EDUCATION to the people who are pro life and to those who are pro abortion.

    Could you engage in a discussion with a person who supports abortion and feel confident that you could at the very least persuade a pro choicer to at least look at the other side because you have good facts and info?
    with accuratWe’ve learned there are many folks who are pro life but stay silent because they don’t have the information and facts to defend their position.
    Which is why we’ve created: “The Power of 7: 7 Effective Replies to 7 Common Pro Choice Arguments.” Visit our website for tutorials in several versions: .PDF, PowerPoint, and audio Podcast.

    God bless you Tom for being, “A BOLD AND ACTIVE VOICE FOR the UNBORN.” 🙂

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  6. I’m a pregnant woman who does not want to have an abortion or give my child up for adoption. I graduated college and suffered from depression which prevented me from getting a job right away. I decided to seek help for depression and find that I am struggling because I need a job. I am having a hard time getting a job because I can only work after 4pm. My skill set is in customer service, and administrative assistant. I can’t pay my rent next month and don’t know what to do.

    1. I will try to remember to pray for you, Kazel, and I trust my prayers WILL be heard: I am not a hypocrite, since even when I MYSELF was a poor college student living on campus in FSU’s dorms, I took in three (3) other people who were homeless –a visiting missionary couple, who were trying to save on hotel/motel rent for the night, and a fellow-student who stayed with me for about 1½ semesters, even though, at times, there were 3 of us in the 2-person dorm.

      “9 He that turneth away his ear from hearing the law, even his prayer shall be abomination” and “31 Now we know that God heareth not sinners: but if any man be a worshipper of God, and doeth his will, him he heareth.” Holy Bible, KJV: Proverbs 28:9 and John 9:31

      I’m not trying to peach to you, but merely assure you that I think God will hear my prayer to help you. Also, if you are pregnant, I feel it is appropriate to seek help from the father of your child. Lastly, if he is unwilling and/or unable to help, I assure you that there ARE honest, Godly people in ALL regions of the earth, and God will move upon their heart to help you with food, clothing, shelter, and medical needs. DO eat a healthy (Genesis 1:29-30 VEGAN) diet, in order that you may be healthy, which I add because America has HIGH cancer rates. See e.g., my research at the ‘health/diet/anti-cancer’ link on my namesake homepage: (GoDaddy) (HostGator) (Lysos/Tripod)

      THREE mirrors, in case one or 2 is a bad or slow connection.

      PS: Even scientists with technology, DNA from dead dinosaurs, and DNA from live toad frogs CAN’T create a dinosaur, so how much less the universe on its own? This (alone!) is proof of God: Proof from creation – so, do not give up your hope and trust in God’s reliability to help to the uttermost.


    2. Oh, 1 thing I neglected, Kazel… I was not bragging in telling you of what I did.

      My MAIN reason to share the help I gave others in a similar situation as yours was to ENCOURAGE you that there are others who are like me — but with even more resources that I had as a poor college student. (It is, also however, true that my prayers for God to send help to you will be more likely to be heard, and this, too, is cause for joy and happiness, but I will not brag: Just know that there are others who are willing to help you -not just me.) — presently, I am almost homeless myself, and living with my father, so I can’t help you, but others will — in time. Do not give up hope.


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